Change the way you think and you can change your life.
There is no getting around the fact that there is going to be a measure of darkness and pain in everyone's life. With resiliency skills we have the power to not only lessen the suffering but find real joy!
What is resilience?
According to Joyce Marter, LCPC, a counselor and owner of the counseling practice Urban Balance, resilience is the “strength to continue on the path which you know to be true, despite obstacles and challenges.”
Resiliency is the ability to move forward when faced with adversity. Resiliency is not positive thinking. Resiliency is not simply assuming the best will happen or an attempt to manifest something into existence. Resiliency is a way of active thinking. With resilience, you acknowledge your problems and understand the situation, and resilience gives you the tools to move forward despite the negative events. It doesn’t make the negative events or pain disappear, but it lessens the suffering experienced by the event. There are many resiliency tools that can be useful in different ways. Resiliency isn’t a skill that will happen overnight, it has to be practiced. When practiced, it will retrain your brain to a new way of thinking and override old programming. Our thoughts give us power, and when we realize we have control over our thoughts we have the power!
Susan Kobasa lists three elements that are essential to resilience:
Challenge – Resilient people view a difficulty as a challenge, not as a paralyzing event. They look at their failures and mistakes as lessons to be learned from, and as opportunities for growth. They don't view them as a negative reflection on their abilities or self-worth.
Commitment – Resilient people are committed to their lives and their goals, and they have a compelling reason to get out of bed in the morning. Commitment isn't just restricted to their work – they commit to their relationships, their friendships, the causes they care about, and their religious or spiritual beliefs.
Personal Control – Resilient people spend their time and energy focusing on situations and events that they have control over. Because they put their efforts where they can have the most impact, they feel empowered and confident. Those who spend time worrying about uncontrollable events can often feel lost, helpless, and powerless to take action.
Our mission is to be an ongoing resource for those seeking to foster resiliency skills to better cope with adversity.
We strive to be a resource you can return to when you want to refresh an old idea or learn more about new ideas that will improve your quality of life and happiness.
"Pain is certain, suffering is optional"